The Cause of Most Fights in Marriage - and it's Not Money!

It is a commonly thought that the number one thing couples fight about is money. That is simply not the case. Although money is a point of stress it is not the biggest issue facing couples. The number one issue that causes the most trouble in marriage is actually a lack of feeling close. Here are 10 other more common problems a marriage faces...
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The Magic 5.5 Hours a Week That will Transform Your Marriage

This is the time of Thanksgiving! Giving thanks for your family, friends, pie, and of course your SPOUSE! For some you reading this eNews e-mail you may have found yourself in a rut relationally. Maybe you just don't know what to do to get started in a positive direction. Small steps are all you need. Yes, baby steps in a positive direction can be the difference between working it out and kicking them out. Before you toss in the towel try just altering 5.5 hours in your week. Not even 5.5 hours in your day JUST your week. This will make a difference:
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How to Reduce Stress & Anger to Lengthen Your Life & the Life of Your Marriage

“Nothing gives one person so much advantage over another as to remain always cool and unruffled under all circumstances.” - Thomas Jefferson While anger is a habitual choice that we make it is one of the hardest habits to kick. How we react to stress is something that we learn from our environment at a very early age. Sometimes we get upset and we don’t even understand why. Things that don’t even phase other people cause us to obsess and/or explode. Last time we talk about how anger is a secondary emotion. We said that underneath the anger there is usually another pain or hurt of some kind. Anger is often a cover up and can be an easier emotion to express than anything deeper. We must deal with the underlying hurts and when we do sometimes the anger still lingers because we have learned to react to issues that way. In this blog I will talk about how anger and stress go hand in hand and how you can take control of it...
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Overcoming Angry Habits that Wreak Our Health and Our Marriages

Anger Gives Power Away Sometimes it helps to realize that problem anger does not gain us the power, control, respect, or the love we want. It only makes us more powerless by placing our peace in the hands of someone or something else. It drives people away. In short, we put ourselves in the powerless victim role. We give the power away when we get angry...

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Do You Struggle With Problem Anger?

Do You Struggle With Problem Anger?

So lets define “problem anger”. It becomes a problem when: It intends to hurt, punish, disparage, or avenge, rather than to build, protect, or defend. Contains malice, hatred, or hostile aggression (we will talk about the companions to anger). Is excessive (disproportionate to the offense) or out os control. Is too frequent, too intense, or lasts too long. Is badly timed. Keeps you constantly on edge, irritable, cynical, cold, critical, or sarcastic. Is chronic. Harms yourself, others, or relationships; leads you to do foolish things - like break furniture, or punch someone or something. Is marked by cruel behavior, including verbal, physical, or emotional abuse, cruelty to animals. Does not feel good; destroys peace; causes you significant distress.

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Crazy Anger, Where Does It Come From?

Crazy Anger, Where Does It Come From?
“Anyone can become angry - that is easy. But to be angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the right purpose, and in the right way - that is not easy.” Aristotle, The Nicomachean Ethics What is Anger? Anger is the easiest secondary emotion we can feel. It is tons easier than accepting responsibility, crying, showing fear, hurt, or letting people see any other vulnerability that actually precedes anger. In fact, when you look up anger in the dictionary you will find it described as “an unpleasant and uncomfortable feeling resulting from injury, mistreatment, or opposition and usually showing itself in a desire to fight back at the supposed cause of the feeling.”
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Establishing Your Identity As A Couple In The First Year of Marriage

The task of the first year of marriage is to establish yourselves as a married couple - to become comfortable with your identity as a married pair and to adapt to dealing with others as married partners. That challenge is often complicated, however, by relatives who, well meaning though they may be, want to make certain that they still play a central role in your lives...

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