Quiz: Has Your Friendship Become an Emotional Affair? 

Directions: Circle Yes or No to the left of each statement.

1. Yes   No   Do you confide more to your friend than to your partner about how your day went? 

2. Yes   No   Do you discuss negative feelings or intimate details about your marriage with your friend but not with your partner?

3. Yes   No   Are you open with your partner about the extent of your involvement with your friend? 

4. Yes   No   Would you feel comfortable if your partner heard your conversation with your friend?

5. Yes   No   Would you feel comfortable if your partner saw a videotape of your meetings?

6. Yes   No   Are you aware of sexual tensions in this friendship?

7. Yes   No   Do you and your friend touch differently when you’re alone than in front of others?

8. Yes   No   Are you in love with your friend? 


Scoring Key:

You get one point for each yes to questions 1, 2, 6, 7, 8 and one point each for no to 3, 4, 5. 

If you scored near 0, this is just a friendship.

If you scored 3 or more, you may not be “just friends.”

If you scored 7-8, you are definitely involved in an emotional affair. 


*This quiz was adapted from Shirley Glass’ book on affairs, “Not Just Friends.” 2003.